Green Tea or Facebook

'I feel that Facebook has made things much harder for life in todays society. I.e. getting over a previous relationship as ex's are still able to get hold of you, winding yourself up by looking at certain profiles, silly over the internet arguments because people can't talk one to one anymore, stuff like that. I want to go back to writing letters and visiting homes, and printing digital photos to stick on the wall.''

This is the reason I gave Facebook regarding deleting my account, not that I have any reason to reason with a website, but I did want to say my piece. I say deleting, Facebook are very sly. They call it ‘de-activating,’ so  that when you're in conflict with yourself and the social networking site, you can log in just as you did before and your account will be re-activated. This means all your wall posts, statuses, pictures, inbox messages, everything is right where you left it. Personally, I think this is a bit silly – how awfully tempting. If you want to break a habit (whether it’s stalking an exes profile, spending more time on the site then actually conversing with someone without the art of typing, or if you’ve realised you have become a compulsive status updater), you need to get rid of anything and everything that may give you impulse to prolong the habit. i.e. getting rid of the account completely, then there will be less of the urge to revisit it. For instance, if somebody was going into rehab for alcoholism, waking up to an irish brew in the morning would be pointless. If the offer is there, you are going to take it. 

Now, I know I am being a slight drama queen here and referring to the social networking site as some sort of addictive drug, but correct me if I’m wrong. Our parents, our siblings, our long lost cousins even our grandparents are on facebook. The networking phenomenon has made us clueless and careless as to how to communicate competently face to face. Little things like photos not being developed anymore, just tagged on facebook for everyone to see. No-one calls up their friends for advice on financial issues or relationship problems. Instead it's a 'like' button/comment/sympathy seeking status update ‘skint, till next month, don’t know what 2 do’ or one of my favourites:''Sheila went from being ‘in a relationship’ to ‘it’s complicated.’ It’s complicated? Then again if you can find the time to sit at the computer and change your status to it's complicated, then yeah it must be pretty complicated. This is then of course this is followed by the ‘friends’ who curiously comment ‘oh no, what’s happened hun?’ Pick up the phone and CALL her for giddy aunts sake. 

Facebook has made society totally inept to deal with situations, even arguments. Everyone argues, it is part of life and the way to overcome certain issues or problems (most of the time). Sometimes you gotta let it all out. These days though, people are more likely to argue over Facebook as they can say anything they like. Knowing they have an audience, people become more harsh and sour with their remarks, harsh but sometimes a good read. Facebook-ees have time to think about what to type, and because they are not accompanied in the same room as one another, they can say what they like without the fear of being swiped. I suppose facebook poking is about as physical as it gets.

It is also a viscous tactic for those to get hold of you, that really shouldn't get hold of you. I.e. ex boyfriends,  perverted foreigners and nosey colleagues. There is no privacy in life anymore, why should I be friends with my boss, I don’t want him/her knowing my weekend antics, seeing pictures of me slumped over a toilet, and it would be especially awkward if I promoted my worst day at work for them to see! You also get the strange foreign people, inboxing you stuff like ‘ I want to kiss your heels, you're a goddess’ Who are you? How did you find me! And the worst, ex partners. Some try to needle their way back in, commenting on a picture from a year ago of you both, just to keep that little reminder there. Or we find ourselves constantly clicking on an exes profile,looking at pictures of him and his pretty new woman, punishing yourself, waiting for the ‘it’s complicated' status to be renewed. Ridiculous.

As soon as I de-activated my facebook, and believe me I was surprisingly surprised, I had the most texts and phone calls I’d received all month..‘Have you deleted me off facebook?’ ‘ Where’s your facebook gone?’ ‘You wrote on my wall the other day, now it’s gone, did you delete it?’ Two of the texts stuck out most. Firstly, from a girl I have known for a few years, who has always ridiculed my strange state of mind, and inability to overcome life’s hurdles. ‘You numpty, you’ve got rid of facebook haven’t you? I went to write on your wall, but you weren’t there, you won’t be able to live without facebook x’ The funny thing is she stated she was going to write on my wall, but then she text straight away – and I was able to reply straight away – ‘Texting is just as good! X’ Whereas, she would have written on my wall for all our ‘mutual’ friends to see, only to have to wait around for me to reply. 

The second text was from another girl, reading: ‘Oh bean (nickname) it must be really bad if you’ve deleted facebook x’ and I must re-quote ‘It must be really bad if you’ve deleted facebook.’ Whatever happened in the world, to make the deletion of a Facebook account become an emphasis on somebody’s stress? Shit, she must be bad, she has deactivated her account! Forget the loss of an appetite, or becoming a recluse, no, no, that doesn’t count…but deleting facebook?  We best get her to the doctors!

Why has the world become so dependent on this social networking site? Nothing is done properly anymore. Birthday invitations, through the door? Nope – event invites online giving people the option of a 'might be attending,'  might be attending? How very rude, do you have a better offer or something? A yes or a no used to be just fine. Oh and forget birthday cards, let's just post on their wall and send them one of those silly virtual e-gift thingies. Hour long phone calls with your best friend? Nah, she will probably be on chat. Lindsay is online. Lindsay is offline. Lindsay is online 'You went off-' Lindsay is offline. What about those keepsake baby books where parents collect first strands of hair and it's first tooth etc? Nowadays, it's a Baby album on facebook for all the world to see. One of my favourites; a girl who had called her Facebook baby photo album 'my baby boy lol.' Lol? Was she really laughing out loud whilst making this photo album? Whats next? 'My dads fiftieth pmsl'?

I hope one day more people begin to realise that we are wasting our time and deteriorating our skills such as talking to each other face to face, organising events, overcoming relationship issues, moving on and trusting one another. We have become lazy and rely on this website to do it all for us. I admit. I am struggling! I feel lost when I open the internet browser and have to stop myself from typing the acebook following www.f.... it has become a routine that I rely on, and it scares me how much time I have wasted in life on the evil website. How many times I have clicked the refresh button to see if anyone has added to the mini-feed, how many times I have groggily panicked on a Monday morning because so and so has tagged me in the pictures from Saturday night. Ten years ago, it was all about detoxing for your health, cutting out booze and cigarettes, eating healthier and drinking green tea...but from today, I never though I'd say it, I am having a Facebook detox, and not for my health, but for my mind!

1 comment:

Leetal said...

i miss the simpler times as well. i hate what we've become...